Quattro Plants Plant!

‘All of our machines are vegan’, says Murphy

Plant hire giant Quattro Plant has moved towards a plant-based future by planting plant.  

‘We’ve been sowing the seeds of this idea for a while now’, says MD John Murphy.  ‘The concept is simple:  Plant the plant. Pay it attention.  Make sure it has all the parts and nourishment it needs from the soil.  Read floral poetry and in just a few weeks it will grow into a full sized digger, ready for hire.  It’s growth for us, growth for the company and growth for our seed fleet of baby diggers.’

The new plan of planting plant is already blossoming, according to Murphy.  ‘Our engineer, Jack Fruit, is leading the operation to ensure that all of our machines are compliant with the Soil Association.  We have been very successful with awards and won twice at the BSPBP*, with a T.O.F.U. and five gold Hammys.’

Excitement is building for the latest campaign theme, ‘Whole Lotta Plant’ which is said to be fronted by singer Robert Plant and will launch later today.  The ad includes endorsement from British naturalist, Sir David Veyganburger, who is said to be thrilled at the prospect.  ‘You reap what you sow!’ he added.  Planter’s Nuts are also rumoured to be on board with the planting plant initiative, saying 'it's simply nutty!'

‘The future is meatless’, says Murphy in his final words. ‘Everything, from the wheels to the tracks, to the brushes on the sweepers will be from planted plant.  There will be no more bringing in the bacon.  It’s time to let the pigs fly.'  And with that, he lifted a spade, and shouted,

'LETTUCE PLANT THE PLANT, TOGETHER!’  

TODAY ONLY:  For planted plant discounted rates call 0845 900 2999, ask for John Murphy quoting ‘I love Murphy’s magic beans.’